I had heard some horror stories about giving birth. Many women don’t get the labor/birthing experience they want because of any number of factors…the hospital wants to speed things up, the doctors are pushing an epidural, c sections happen instead of natural births… The list goes on and has been different for different people. My birth plan was fairly simple – I wanted a natural delivery. I wasn’t sure about the epidural/any type of pain medication. And I wanted to be able to walk around.
File this under the ‘be careful what you wish for’ category.
Today, I am 40 weeks pregnant. Today is my due date. And today I feel I am no closer to meeting this baby than I was three weeks ago.
To preface, I know I’m blessed and I know I’m lucky and I 100% do not take this baby or pregnancy for granted. So please don’t take this blog as anything less than a super stressed out, very pregnant woman sharing some real thoughts that I’m sure are not specific to me. Continue reading “40 weeks”→
Monday, April 6, 2015
Husband and I are sitting on the couch with our 15 year old dog, Chewie, who we are going to be taking to the vet in three minutes to put down. We’re both crying, hugging Chewie, and reassuring each other (and Chewie) that this is the right decision. He couldn’t walk, his lymph nodes were the size of baseballs, he’d lost over 20 pounds, and he had “the look”. Dog lovers, you know the look – the look of “I’m ready. It’s ok. The only reason I’m staying alive right now is because I don’t want to make you sad.”
Then my phone rings. It’s a local number I don’t recognize, and the only reason I answer it is because I think it’s my doctor’s office calling to confirm an appointment I had in two days. I try to compose myself and say, “Hello?” I hear, “Ryann? It’s LS, from Caring for Kids. I’m calling to let you know that K and L have chosen to meet with you and Husband.”
What??? Then I start crying again. I explain through tears that we’re just about to take our dog to be put down, and I was crying out of sadness, now I’m crying because I’m so happy. We schedule a breakfast meeting at IHOP for Wednesday. It’s going to be K, L, LS (social worker), Husband, and myself. Wow.
I feel as if I have started this post a half dozen times over the last few weeks. I had every intention of writing it right after Keely was born, but if you’re a mom then you know that even plans with the best intentions don’t always happen. So now here I am on the first night of Keely officially in her room and I’m really writing her birth story. It feels like a weird turn of fate. Continue reading “Keely Kangaroo’s Birth Story”→